I had a dream last night. It was crazy to say the least. Allow me to set this up for you. Before I went to bed last night, I was having a discussion on Facebook with one of my friends, Eric, about the preparations taking place for the impending Zombie Apocalypse. This conversation was mostly for entertainment purposes, but there was also a sliver of truth contained within it. That’s partially to blame for this dream I had last night. I believe another strong contributing factor was the fact that I was watching Blade Trinity due to my desire to see the Miss Jessica Biel and her compound bow. There’s just something incredibly sexy about a lady who knows how to use a bow!
So sit back and let me tell you more about this dream…
It was a beautiful spring afternoon here in south Florida. It wasn’t overly hot this day, somewhere in the mid 80’s with humidity hovering around 65%. My main broseph, Chris, was visiting from Indiana. He and I were riding 4-wheelers out in the woods down here doing a little hunting for wild boar. Chris and I had stopped near a covering close to a canal; waiting to spot some boars who were making their way to the watering hole for a drink to quench their thirst. We were talking about what we were going to do with the meat we were going to get this afternoon. Chris wanted to grill some of the meat and I told him I thought we should throw some in the smoker as well.
While we were discussing all of this, I glanced up to the sky after I heard the shriek of what sounded like a bald eagle. The next thing I know, I heard a gunshot. Chris had just taken a shot at a zombie! We started the 4-wheelers up and made our way to the body that was laying lifeless across a piece of a decaying tree that had fallen some time ago. Standing over the body, Chris looked up at me and said, “Bro! It’s starting!” He was obviously talking about the beginning of the Zombie Apocalypse!
We left the body and made our way back up to the house at the front of the land. Chris and I had been preparing for this moment for most of our lives. We had been learning survival skills since the first time we each held a fishing pole. Upon entering the house, we made our way to the attic where we had a large cache of weaponry stored. We started moving all of the guns, ammunition, bows, arrows, and other assorted weapons to the kitchen table so we could take inventory of what we had. I sent out a mass text message to everyone with whom we had already picked to be on our survival team, letting them know that it had started and they needed to make their way to the rally point.
After we made sure the weapons were all accounted for and secured, Chris and I jumped on the 4-wheelers and double checked the perimeter of the grounds making sure it was all secure as well. What we had done in the months prior was set ourselves up a compound. The property was surrounded by a 12 foot fence with razor wire topping it. We made sure the fencing was all in good order and secured the front gate. Standing at the front gate, we looked at each other and Chris said, “Are you ready for this?” To which I replied, “You already know, bro!”
We rode back to the house and started preparing for the arrival of the rest of our team. We finished cleaning one of the boars we had killed earlier in the day and threw that in the barbeque pit. We figured it would take several hours for our team to arrive, which gave us plenty of time to get the meat cooked for dinner. While Chris was putting the final touches on our dinner, I made my way out to the three outbuildings that contained some of our provisions. Double checking the security of those buildings, I picked up a few items that we needed to go with our meal for the evening. It was going to be a long night; waiting for our team to arrive and then going over the game plan with everyone once they did arrive. I made sure our generators were topped off with some diesel, then headed back up to the house.
I remembered that I had discussed a flag system with everyone in a prior team meeting. Knowing the different colors of the flags would alert any teammates to the status of our rally point. We had six different flags that would be flown: a black flag – signifying the rally point had been compromised, a yellow flag – signifying that the live band was playing and the drinks were flowing, a white flag with a red cross – signifying that appropriate medical personnel was on site, a red flag – signifying that we were running low on provisions, a blue flag – signifying that we were preparing to move to the next rally point (water), and a green flag – signifying the Zombie Apocalypse was finally over. Knowing all of these flags and their meanings, coupled with the fact that we were expecting the rest of our team soon, I ran upstairs and made sure we had the yellow flag hoisted to the top of the pole!
With the boar cooking, the weapons secured, the compound secured, the kegs of Yuengling chilling, and the video system turned on – Chris and I sat down and started watching the news. The Zombie Apocalypse was spreading at an alarming rate. We knew we would be ok, but we worried about the rest of our team traveling down from the Midwest. We maintained constant communication with the team to make sure they were traveling safely.
As we were sitting there watching the news, we heard a knock at the door. The crazy thing is, nobody had hit the buzzer at the front gate, and we weren’t expecting anyone for at least six hours. Chris tossed me one of the Remington 870’s and I got up to see who it was…